The Story So Far

At the start of the semester, I was very interested to see what Seeing Sideways was all about.  Through the semester so far, I have discovered that the class isn't quite what I expected.  In class we mostly have discussions and talk about projects that we have done for assignments.  This is all fine and dandy, but I was wanting more out of the class than just discussions.  Don't get me wrong, the discussions are great; they are very interesting, comical, thought provoking, and educational.  I feel if the class was broken down into two parts for each class time, that might be more up my alley.  I would like to see the first hour and a half be discussion and the second hour and a half be something different (I don't know what I'm really looking for for this half of the class time, but I know I don't like to sit still for a whole class period).  Overall, I am really enjoying the class and the assignments we have, I know I've never had a class like this before or will ever have again.

Why Am I Here?

Why Am I Here?

     When I start to think "Why Am I Here?", many thoughts go through my head.  Why was I put on this earth, as a human, and as a male?  Why was I born into my family instead of someone else's of any species?  Why am I anywhere at any given time?  I have many different opinions as to why I'm here.  First off, I'm not a religious person.  I belong to no religion, yet I believe in something, however I'm still not sure what.  So, at times I believe I have a purpose as to why I am here.  When I say "here" I mean on earth as a male human living in Indiana doing the things that I do and the way that I do them.  I feel that god as put me here for a reason, whether in the end it is good or bad, it all has a purpose and keeps the world interesting.  On the other hand, I think that type of thinking is complete bullshit.  There is no plan for me, there is no reason for my being.  It's completely random and that's just the way it is.  I find it easier to think through my first opinion, yet I don't take it too seriously.  For me not to go crazy thinking about why I'm here, choice #1 keeps me a little more sane and it's easier to wrap my head around.  Why I'm here, right now, at a computer typing this blog about "Why I'm here" is because of countless actions throughout the time of anything.  So, "Why Am I Here?", I think their is a reason for why I'm here right now at this point in time, yet I will never know why.  That's the easy answer.

     Why am I here in NEWM N385 Seeing Sideways at IUPUI with Beth Lykins, because I chose to go back to school when I was 24 and pursue a degree in New Media.  I need to take a certain amount of credit hours in NEWM at the 300 level and I had heard from past students who have taken the class that it is a very interesting class, so I thought I would see what all the hype was all about.  That's why I'm here in this class.

Reaction to Fear Part II

I was unable to make it to class for part one of our fear projects, so I wasn't sure what to expect when I came into class for part two of the projects.  Of course this meant I had to present on this day, which i felt I could have done a much better job on coming up with an experiment and project all together.  I found that the projects brought out a lot of emotions with the presenters as well as for the rest of the class.  There were two projects that stood out to me because they were so personal to the presenter and it took a lot of courgae for them to tell the class what theie fears were.  I also enjoyed the balloon popping project becuase it was a got icebreaker to get out of the emotional state the class had gotten into and it made the transition into my project easier.  From what I've heard, I missed some really great projects from part one, but I think part two had some really great work as well and was kind of like a bonding experience for those that where there.

Fear Project Experience and Presentation

Today I presented my experiment for the Fear Project and I got the reaction I though I would have from the class.  For my project I gave everyone a single piece of blank white paper and told them they had 3 minutes. That was all I told them, that they had 3 minutes.  The purpose of this experiment was to conquer a fear of my own and help the class face a fear of their own or maybe tell me about it.  The reason i chose to do my experiment this way is because I am personally very fearful of having attention on me, so standing up in front of the class was not something I really wanted to do.  I am also fearful of looking like a colossal ass-bag in front of people (which is what i felt when I just gave you guys the paper without instructions).  After I did the experiment, I realized that none of you probably thought I looked like an idiot standing up there giving you no instructions, but instead you were more concerned with what you need or wanted to do with the paper.  I purposely did not give the class any writing utensils because I didn't necessarily want you to just write something down, I wanted you to face your Fear of the Unknown (like many students do).  I wanted you to do something creative with the paper or maybe even write down something personal or a fear you might have.  After looking through the papers I got back from the class, I found that 3 people decided to make paper airplanes (which i expected), 1 made a paper fold game, 2 folded the paper and I'm not sure what they are suppose to be, 2 didn't even do anything with the paper, most of you either drew and picture or wrote something on the paper or both.  I was surprised to find one crumpled up piece of paper with a list of fears or secrets on it.

After thinking about the experiment I only got a little bit out of a few people of what I really wanted, but I got what I thought would happen from most of you.  In conclusion, my fear of have the spotlight on me is really uncalled for because most people aren't paying attention anyways and even those that are, they're probably thinking about something else.  Most people are predictable when you give them something to do for 3 minutes with instructions.

Fear Part 1 Recap

I was not in class for the first part of the fear presentations, so I do not have a favorite part.

Tears For Fears

To me a fear is something that everyone must have to really feel alive.  Without fear we would live without emotion and drive.  Everyone has some sort of fear in them whether the realize it or not.  Some fears are more obvious than others, but they all elicit the same pulses in the body.

I expect the class to not understand my experiment right away, but hopefully it will be something they will think about for the weeks after and realize what I was trying to accomplish regarding fears.

My Bliss

For my 3 hours of "Me Time" I wanted to go to IMS and watch the Indycars and just be at the track because that is my favorite thing to do.  However, since it's only March, I had to settle for lounging on the couch and watching the 1992 Indy 500, which was still very relaxing and enjoyable.

I was not in class for the day the stuffed animals were handed out.  After reading the assignment details I realized that I did have one "stuffed animal" at one.  I searched through boxes I had in a closet and pulled out a Homer Simpson stuffed doll, I guess you could call it that.  Homer is about 16 inches tall, so I decided I would buckle him in to the passengers seat of my car and drive him around with me for a week so that he could get out of the cramped box he was in and experience the world through the passengers seat in my car.